There is no such thing as Santa Claus. There is no such thing as the Easter Bunny. There is no such thing as the ‘self-made’ man.
Maybe no one had to finally tell you there was no Santa Claus. But if you believe in the self-made man, my guess is that punk Mary Claire in the third
grade had to break the news to you on the playground in front of your equally stunned friends.
Nobody did it ‘my way’. Sorry Frank. Even if your song is the national anthem of self-made men. In reality a more honest title would have been ‘I got my
butt kicked and fired from my job my way’.
Point of fact: There is no English translation for ‘I am doing it my way’ to your wife.
But guys are guys. Especially American men. We are Daniel Boone, Audie Murphy, John Wayne, Indiana Jones (when he was young).
Men need manly affirmations of our manliness. So even though Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny and Peter Pan fell by the wayside, they weren’t really that
manly in the first place.
So the self-made man is not going away anytime soon. Not even because of punks like Mary Claire.
Next topic:
(This made it into the column because I am writing this while sitting in a coffee shop on vacation next to some loud and proud Texans. I guess we are too
far west for New Yorkers to fill the role.)
The defenders of the Alamo made a run for it. Most of them. Just waited too long. Got run down by Mexican lancers outside the walls. Sorry Texas, get over
yourself.
They did it their way.